Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Fozzie's speech and other Muppet awesomeness.
The last post got me excited about The Great Muppet Caper, which I watched over and over and over again. This scene here is packed with oodles of funny. Some highlights include Janice's weird confession (2:38), Fozzie's speech (3:27), and Miss Piggy busting out of jail (9:19). Shit, there's so many good parts here, I can't list them all. "Don't we have a gig around here or something or somewhere?"
Get pumped.
How can you not love this? It combines Braveheart, Free Willy, Shawshank Redemption, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, Cool Runnings, Robin Hood, The Great Muppet Caper, The Goonies, and more into one rambling but inspirational speech.
Saturday, December 13, 2008
I'll have some hilarity with my scary.
FROM GEEKOLOGIE:
A team of Japanese researchers believe they're well on the way to developing a technology capable of displaying whatever is on a person's mind. Including pictures, dreams, and, God willing, sex with dinosaurs.
While the team for now has managed to reproduce only simple images from the brain, they said the technology could eventually be used to figure out dreams and other secrets inside people's minds.
"It was the first time in the world that it was possible to visualize what people see directly from the brain activity," the private institute said in a statement.
"By applying this technology, it may become possible to record and replay subjective images that people perceive like dreams."
Say, this reminds me of one of my own favorite dreams: I exit my cave wearing only an animal pelt. I spot a triceratops -- it catches my gaze. I approach and begin tenderly rubbing its horns while making cooing sounds. The beast gores me. I lay in the mud, bleeding to death. With my last breath I reach out to touch its genitals and....it crushes my arm with a single stomp from one of its massive legs. i wake from the dream dripping sweat, and also, other stuff. Damn -- I should write romance novels!
Dreams may no longer be secret with Japan computer screen [yahoonews]
Thanks to austin, Derrick, Ain and Zombie Bob, who have the ability to make your dreams come true, but only if you buy their set of instructional video for three easy payments of $39.95.
And now some clips of dinosaur fucking.
A team of Japanese researchers believe they're well on the way to developing a technology capable of displaying whatever is on a person's mind. Including pictures, dreams, and, God willing, sex with dinosaurs.
While the team for now has managed to reproduce only simple images from the brain, they said the technology could eventually be used to figure out dreams and other secrets inside people's minds.
"It was the first time in the world that it was possible to visualize what people see directly from the brain activity," the private institute said in a statement.
"By applying this technology, it may become possible to record and replay subjective images that people perceive like dreams."
Say, this reminds me of one of my own favorite dreams: I exit my cave wearing only an animal pelt. I spot a triceratops -- it catches my gaze. I approach and begin tenderly rubbing its horns while making cooing sounds. The beast gores me. I lay in the mud, bleeding to death. With my last breath I reach out to touch its genitals and....it crushes my arm with a single stomp from one of its massive legs. i wake from the dream dripping sweat, and also, other stuff. Damn -- I should write romance novels!
Dreams may no longer be secret with Japan computer screen [yahoonews]
Thanks to austin, Derrick, Ain and Zombie Bob, who have the ability to make your dreams come true, but only if you buy their set of instructional video for three easy payments of $39.95.
And now some clips of dinosaur fucking.
Friday, December 12, 2008
Knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting and knitting!
This is like cocaine for my eyeballs. What does that mean? I don't know, but this is it!
by Patrick Ceuppens
It makes me feel like babbling like Pee Wee:
On a side note, I want to know Amazing Larry. I want to be him. I want to be in him. He's a peripheral member in Pee Wee's gang, yet he could carry an entire movie himself.
by Patrick Ceuppens
It makes me feel like babbling like Pee Wee:
On a side note, I want to know Amazing Larry. I want to be him. I want to be in him. He's a peripheral member in Pee Wee's gang, yet he could carry an entire movie himself.
The Indomitable Park Ji Sung
If anyone knows this guy, please contact us. We will open up for him anytime, anywhere.
Thursday, December 11, 2008
This here is Elizabeth Frisinger, and she is every dad's nightmare.
Girls and boys, meet Elizabeth (Lizzy) Frisinger, 18. This cute, dead-behind-the-eyes Cleveland girl will be locked in her parents' basement until she's 30. She lost her virginity in a night of "gr8" sex on the beach during a class trip. Afterwards, she hurriedly grabbed her phone to text her best friend the life-changing news. Unfortunately, dearest Lizzy, buzzing from her first sexual experience and cheap tequila, texted her father instead:
After the early morning flight and the excruciatingly slow cab ride home: Most awkward parent/child conversation ever.
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
PARTY! This Saturday, December 6th, 2008 PARTY!
Hey everybody,
This Saturday, I am having a joint birthday party/ Groundworks
Opportunities Fundraiser. This is a great charity that gets its
fingers into a lot of important work. For example, many American
doctors give up their time and services by volunteering in
impoverished towns in Africa. The problem is, they can't stay there
for long. One of the things Groundworks Opportunities does is pay for
one member of the village to attend medical school, so they can be the doctor for that village. It's the whole teach a man to fish thing in
action, and you can be a part of it. As you can see, you are free to
donate what you can afford, but when you wake up the next morning with the inevitable hangover, soothe your aching head content in the
knowledge that your battered liver and brain helped save hundreds,
possibly thousands, of lives. If you are staying sober, good for you,
and your presence and generosity will be all the more appreciated.
Also, I will be DJing for much of the night, so you know the music is
going to be good. The space is beautiful, you are all beautiful, and
the condensation on a glass of whiskey on the rocks is beautiful, so
come revel in all of it. Details provided by Peter Prato and Jordan
Blackman below:
Please join us this Saturday at 9:00 at 2150 Folsom St. for dancing,
singing, celebrating, drinking, and being merry.
What
The 3x30
Three Friends.
All celebrating their 30th year.
Three bands.
Mix that together with a couple of olives and some holiday cheer and
you've got yourself one hell of a party.
Where
Workspace Limited
http://www.workspacelimited.org/
2150 Folsom St.
In this fair city, San Francisco, California
When
This Saturday
December 6th. 9:00 p.m.
Why
Because
we love these people,
and we love you, too.
Who
Somehow At Sea - 11:00
Future Says Run - 10:00
Rob White 9:15
Live music will be followed by dancing and the selections of DJ Andrew Gomez
How Much
Sliding Scale Donation $5 - $20
All proceeds will go directly to our friends at...
GO!
groundworkopportunities.org
Which means our good time will go a long way towards making a big
difference in the lives of people that don't have much.
The space is awesome. A cash bar will be stocked with wine beer and
liquor. The music is prepared.
We've got three bands, three friends' birthdays, and a cause to celebrate.
More About GO!
GO!'s mission is simple- we provide local opportunities for people to
give back globally. We are committed to supporting existing work that
is being done throughout the world to strengthen communities, provide
education, and create lasting, tangible connections between our
societies.
We can't wait to see you.
It's going to be fun.
This Saturday, I am having a joint birthday party/ Groundworks
Opportunities Fundraiser. This is a great charity that gets its
fingers into a lot of important work. For example, many American
doctors give up their time and services by volunteering in
impoverished towns in Africa. The problem is, they can't stay there
for long. One of the things Groundworks Opportunities does is pay for
one member of the village to attend medical school, so they can be the doctor for that village. It's the whole teach a man to fish thing in
action, and you can be a part of it. As you can see, you are free to
donate what you can afford, but when you wake up the next morning with the inevitable hangover, soothe your aching head content in the
knowledge that your battered liver and brain helped save hundreds,
possibly thousands, of lives. If you are staying sober, good for you,
and your presence and generosity will be all the more appreciated.
Also, I will be DJing for much of the night, so you know the music is
going to be good. The space is beautiful, you are all beautiful, and
the condensation on a glass of whiskey on the rocks is beautiful, so
come revel in all of it. Details provided by Peter Prato and Jordan
Blackman below:
Please join us this Saturday at 9:00 at 2150 Folsom St. for dancing,
singing, celebrating, drinking, and being merry.
What
The 3x30
Three Friends.
All celebrating their 30th year.
Three bands.
Mix that together with a couple of olives and some holiday cheer and
you've got yourself one hell of a party.
Where
Workspace Limited
http://www.workspacelimited.org/
2150 Folsom St.
In this fair city, San Francisco, California
When
This Saturday
December 6th. 9:00 p.m.
Why
Because
we love these people,
and we love you, too.
Who
Somehow At Sea - 11:00
Future Says Run - 10:00
Rob White 9:15
Live music will be followed by dancing and the selections of DJ Andrew Gomez
How Much
Sliding Scale Donation $5 - $20
All proceeds will go directly to our friends at...
GO!
groundworkopportunities.org
Which means our good time will go a long way towards making a big
difference in the lives of people that don't have much.
The space is awesome. A cash bar will be stocked with wine beer and
liquor. The music is prepared.
We've got three bands, three friends' birthdays, and a cause to celebrate.
More About GO!
GO!'s mission is simple- we provide local opportunities for people to
give back globally. We are committed to supporting existing work that
is being done throughout the world to strengthen communities, provide
education, and create lasting, tangible connections between our
societies.
We can't wait to see you.
It's going to be fun.
They got me.
This warms the cockles of my heart. It triggers memories of old middle school flames, stokes my love of cute female authority figures, and strokes the boner I have for wordsmithery and eloquence. I'm gay for this commercial. What are they selling? I'll take four.
Monday, December 1, 2008
Bill Maher says how it is.
This dude makes conservatives furious, because he's an atheist and his logic is bullet-proof. No appeals to emotion or patriotism here, just a slice of The Truth.
"Crazy" Christians
That's what this video is called. "Crazy Christians". Bullshit. This mom is having a very typical reaction to her teenage son rejecting her values. I wouldn't call her "crazy" just because she's pissed off. Hell, her son just denounced her entire belief system after he got confirmed, and I think she's taking it quite well. Call her crazy for believing in an old man in the sky who watches her and everybody in the world's every move, but this? This is what I'd show an alien if they asked what a "mom" is. Still funny, though.
Mario Theme on bottles with RC car
I love the Japanese. They have a love of all things nerdy and all the free time in the world. This is how we get little servings of casual genius like this:
Motorcycle Texting
I got a friend Will, who swears he is a motorcycling daredevil. When you are the shit, you don't need to say shit. Like this guy:
He doesn't give 1/8 of a shit about anything. His phone, his bike, his life. He couldn't be more bored with it all. Or is India so fucked up that you are constantly looking for ways to kill yourself? I choose to believe this guy is either a super-insane bad ass or an angel that's come to Earth to help out some poor schlub and can't die anyway, so fuck it, y'know?
He doesn't give 1/8 of a shit about anything. His phone, his bike, his life. He couldn't be more bored with it all. Or is India so fucked up that you are constantly looking for ways to kill yourself? I choose to believe this guy is either a super-insane bad ass or an angel that's come to Earth to help out some poor schlub and can't die anyway, so fuck it, y'know?
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